Marriage is not something which comes under the auspices of human rights, unless you can argue successfully that denial of the right to marry a same sex partner is discriminatory. For example, it means denial of tax benefits or other quantifiable disadvantage.

If you cannot successfully argue a denial of human rights, you are left with a cultural disagreement, which has little bearing on anything except on how people think about one another. But trying to change people’s minds about a single issue vis a vis homosexuality will not work — the people will still have problems with homosexuals in general.
But as heather so obviously demonstrates, it is still possible for some people to convince themselves that they consider a certain type of person an equal while practically not following that belief. And the reason is that the culture will not allow for it, and they have to make a choice, whether they are comfortable with that choice or not.

So you are right, I believe, Kevin, that it is essential for anti-gay people to meet and know gay people as people, but this is unrealistic for most people with such prejudices. The prejudices are simply too ingrained.

I think, if we all believe in peaceful resolutions, that the only solution is to wait one more generation and see how much improvement has come about. Or gay people and their friends and families can continue to be in the face of the public until enough fence sitters change their minds.

In any case, on cultural questions that are not demonstrably connected to human rights, you are stuck, in terms of legalization, with what the majority (or the majority of representatives) believes.