We have more pictures! Of course, there’s nothing to say except they’re of my beautiful children and a couple have their funny lookin’ dad in them:
Disclaimers and Stuff
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Babies are fun. Toddlers are more fun, especially when they can talk and play games; but, babies are fun in their own way. Brian is 8 days old now, and he’s trying to lift his head, is really good at flailing his arms and kicking his blankets off. He still sleeps a lot, but is now spending more time awake and staring at us. I love it. His little eyes are focusing and moving in the same direction (no more cross eyes… at least most of the time).
It’s fun finding out which body parts look like someone else in the family. In comparing baby pictures, Brian looks almost exactly like Max at the same age. Brian is a little longer, a little heavier and has (we think) a slightly bigger head. But, we’re probably going to have to start marking baby pictures so we know who’s who.
We’re now a family of four. I have two kids. Ok, I think it’s sunk in now.
Come and get ‘em!! Pictures from Wednesday and Thursday. Heather took a bunch of pictures yesterday, and I’ll let you know when they’re up.
We finally have the pictures up! Bask in the warm glow of brand new baby. I’m going to bed.
It’s Heather again with another update. I’ve been trying to get a web gallery up of the pictures I took of cute not-so-little Brian, but my computer’s acting up. So instead, you’re going to get three individual links. Just. Like. This. Number three is by far my favorite – it’s the Thinking Baby! More later, I promise… if my computer will cooperate.
Here he is, Brian David Lawver (named after Jen’s dad), less than ten minutes old, and beautiful. Heather took a ton of pictures which she promised to post soon. Keep your eyes peeled for a link.
new baby, boy, 10:55
I tried to follow up yesterday’s exercise with the opposite. The same rules apply except for the techno one, with one fudge. I honestly can’t remember putting Teardrop on a mix cd, but the way I love that song, I can’t believe it. Maybe I just never shared it with anyone.
A couple other things I realized while compiling this list:
Here it is, a CD I whimsically call Depressed as Hal:
|II. Lento E Largo – Tranquillissimo||Henryk Gorecki||Symphony No. 3|
|Everybody Hurts||R.E.M.||Automatic For The People|
|I Grieve||Peter Gabriel||Up|
|Don’t Change Your Plans||Ben Folds Five||The Unauthorized Biography Of Reinhold Messner|
|Gone For Good||Morphine||Yes|
|Evaporated||Ben Folds Five||Whatever and Ever Amen|
|Passacaglia/Bud And A Slice||Joe Jackson, feat. Brad Roberts – voice, Judy LeClair – bassoon||Heaven & Hell|
|Sweetness Follows||R.E.M.||Automatic For The People|
|My Head Sounds Like That||Peter Gabriel||Up|
|Maybe I’ll Come Down||Soul Coughing||El Oso|
Taking a break this afternoon, I decided to create a happy mix CD (for no good reason, titled Happy Schmidt). I gave myself a couple rules:
Here’s what I came up with:
|In The Days Of The Caveman||Crash Test Dummies||God Shuffled His Feet|
|Ain’t Goin’ to Goa||A3||Exile On Coldharbor Lane|
|Count ‘em Up Queek||2NU||Ponderous|
|Underground||Ben Folds||Ben Folds Five|
|Short Skirt/Long Jacket||Cake||Comfort Eagle|
|Rudie Can’t Fail||The Clash||London Calling|
|Brick House||Commodores||Millennium Funk Party|
|Tripping Billies||Dave Matthews Band||Crash|
|You Better Be Doubtful||The Housemartins||The The People Who Grinned Themselves To Death|
|updated Rotten World Blues||Eels||rotten world blues EP|
|Glamour Boys||Living Colour||Pride|
|Penguins||Lyle Lovett||I Love Everybody|
|Birds Of A Feather||Phish||Story Of The Ghost|
|Boll Weevil||The Presidents of the United States of America||The Presidents Of The United States Of America|
|Shiny Happy People||R.E.M.||Out Of Time|
|Stay Up Late||Talking Heads||Sand In The Vaseline (Disc 2)|
|What Is Hip?||Tower Of Power||Millennium Funk Party|
|Once In A Lifetime||Talking Heads||Sand In The Vaseline (Disc 1)|
|updated That’s Not Really Funny||Eels||Souljacker|
updated I was listening to the CD in the car and realized that I Wanna Be A Witch, while really happy and bouncy, contains some profanity. This wouldn’t normally bother me, but the CD had to be Max-friendly too, so I’m making a new copy. I dropped that song, and added Rotten World Blues and That’s Not Really Funny, both by Eels. Good, jangly, rocky stuff.
I have been a very good Employee today. I deserve some kind of SuperEmployee sticker and a bad picture of me in a cheap frame hung on the wall in our temporary lobby that says, “Kevin’s One Super Employee”. I may go do that myself tonight with Max. We’ll make a “Kevin’s One Super Employee” plaque. Then, I’ll bring to work really early tomorrow morning and hang it up before anyone gets here. Maybe I should start with someone else so no one suspects me. Although, I think I’m the only person here who would do such a thing, and everyone knows it. I have a pirate flag up on my wall, ferpetessack.
And to answer your next question, I have a pirate flag on my wall for a very good reason. I’ve been feeling extremely subversive lately. There’s usually a subversive undercurrent running through whatever I do. Recently, though, the undercurrent has become an undertorrent, and I just can’t help it. Maybe I’m feeling extra-subversive because my boss, and boss’s boss have both left in the past six weeks, and I’m feeling a little… grieved? Yeah, that’s as close as I can come to describing it. I lost the guy who hired me, protected our group from a lot of garbage, was in our corner the whole time, and made us better. I’ve also lost the best manager I’ve ever had. It’s kind of thrown me for a loop.
I’m not quite sure what to do next. I still have my projects, the things that “make me go”, but I don’t have the support system I had last week. I don’t have a manager I can tell anything to, give her any problem, and compliant and she’ll go fight the battle, or filter the message appropriately. I have a crappy filter. I usually just come out and say it, which isn’t the most productive trait to possess at the moment.
I’ve come to realize that I work best with a manager I can trust completely. I don’t want to have to play political games, and watch what I say with my direct manager. It’s too stressful, and makes work no fun at all. I have to be able to tell my manager what’s really going on, and have them do the same. If there’s no honesty in that relationship, there’s no trust. When there’s no trust, nothing productive happens. I’ve done pretty well so far in my career finding people I can trust, and good working relationships. The times I haven’t had that support system have been an absolute nightmare.
I don’t know… this post started out really light and sunny, didn’t it? I was faking it. There’s nothing sunny or light going on here. I’m worried that I won’t find that working chemistry again, and I’ll just be working instead of having fun. I’m afraid I’ll spend my days playing politics instead of building cool stuff and challenging myself. I’ve done that already. I’d rather not go back to it. You know, maybe everything will be alright. Maybe it won’t. It’s the not knowing that’s killing me at the moment.