Ultranormal

Author: Kevin Lawver

  • This Modern World is brilliant

    This Modern World is brilliant today. Bill Clinton was the source of a comedy boom. Bush is single-handedly killing satire, because he is one! The man scares the living crap out of me.

  • Football Observations

    I feel I’m breaking some kind of rule here talking about football in a blog, since I started my blog-life reading erudite journals about the industry, photography and literature. And now, here I am writing about football. Well, that’s just who I am, baby. I dig the geeky, and the banal. I’m a conundrum wrapped in a perplexity wrapped in flaky pastry.

    Sorry, had to do it. Now on to what I think about week 1 in the NFL (minus tonight’s game):

    1. I think LaDainian Tomlinson is the real thing. 113 yards in his first game is one thing, but the kid blocked like a veteran and didn’t make any glaring rookie mistakes that I could see.
    2. The Chargers D will rival the Ravens for this year. They looked absolutely awesome yesterday. I’m not sure if the Redskins are really that bad, or if the Chargers just stifled them.
    3. The Redskins really are that bad.
    4. It’s definitely week 1. With all the games without touchdowns and poor offensive play, it looked like everyone but the Colts and 49ers needed another week of training camp.
    5. Peyton Manning is the best QB in football, bar none. Watching him work the line of scrimmage, play the no-huddle like Jim Kelly on speed and make some impossible throws was just poetry. Also, that 9-yard run yesterday blew me away. For a “pocket” QB, he’s got quite a motor on him. He played an impeccible game yesterday.

    I think that’s it for this week. On a completely separate subject, we watched Band of Brothers last night, and I was slightly disappointed. Maybe it was all the hype, but I was expecting more. It seemed like Tom Hanks and Mr. Spielberg are trying to redo Private Ryan and fix the shortcomings of the movie. I’ll try it again next week, but it didn’t grab me like I expected it to. Something about it seems “off”, either something missing or too much of something else. I can’t put my finger on it.

  • Great Column in the Washington

    Great Column in the Washington Post Magazine today. Football really is America’s game now. The only romance left for baseball is in the once-a-decade baseball movie that renews our faith in the history of the game that enthralled this country for the first half of the century.

  • And So It Begins

    I have a lot of stuff to talk about today, and I’m not sure where I want to start. Let’s start with the weekend movie reviews and see what I have energy for.

    Enemy at the Gates: I think there should be more movies about the horrible time the Russians had during WW2. The US lost 500,000 soldiers in Europe and Pacific combined. The British, about the same (I could be wrong about that one). The Russians lost 20 million soldiers and civilians during the war, some killed by their own commanders. There are some amazing stories from the war, and in all the hoopla from the past couple years for WW2, it’s time to show stories that aren’t American. Enemy at the Gates is a great example of what I’d like to see more of. While showing the horror of the war for the Russian people, it’s really an intimate story of four people and how they cope with their situation. The suspense is great, the acting superb, and the duel between Jude Law and Ed Harris’ characters was superb. I enjoyed this movie, and I think anyone who liked Private Ryan, but thought it was missing something, this movie has what was missing, I think. Definitely a great rental.

    Momento: Woo-hoo, we’re two for two this weekend! This was a fun mystery. It reminded me a lot of The Usual Suspects. It’s a well-made movie with a great gimmick executed perfectly. The first viewing is eye-opening, and a great ride, and it might hold up to a second viewing to try to catch all the clues. It’s not a movie I’ll watch again, but it’s one I’d definitely recommend if you like film noir or good mysteries. The performances were all solid, and the story was nicely paced and the payoff was perfect. I would have loved to have seen the story told in the chronological order and see if it affected the impact of the ending. I’m sure it would, but it would still be fun to see.

    Now that I’m on a roll… Football!! Football, football, football!! It’s here, it’s started, the first quarter of the Colts-Jets game has ended, and I couldn’t be happier!! It’s time for popcorn and fantasy football and yeah yeah yeah. Can you tell I like football?

  • Cartoon Network grows up I

    Cartoon Network grows up

    I couldn’t sleep last night so I went downstairs and started flipping through the channels. Cartoon Network had this four hour block of programming called Adult Swim. Curious, I watched, and holy cow! I saw the most stylish, campy, funny Anime I’ve ever seen! Cowboy Bebop is your salvation from Pokemon, Sailor Moon, Dragonball Z and all the other cartoon-lite shows out there. It’s cool. Mix acid jazz with killer design, bounty hunters, cool vehicles and weapons, and camp dialogue and you have one kickass show. Keep an eye out for it.

  • Lynda Barry’s Comic was just

    Lynda Barry’s Comic was just about the most heart-wrenching four panels I’ve ever seen.

    If you haven’t read Lynda Barry’s work before, it’s amazing. I used to read it every week in the Tucson Weekly, and I’m now very happy that’s she’s featured in Salon.

  • Week 1

    Do you know how hard it is to pick a fantasy lineup in week 1? It’s tough! I’ve switched between starting quarterbacks at least three times, and defenses 4 or 5. I even dropped one of my D’s and picked up the Chargers! I’m going insane. Kurt Warner is the better QB, but he’s playing Philly and Elvis Grbac is playing against Chicago’s suspect D.

    How have I resolved my dilemna? I decided to go with my gut. My gut says the Dolphins will have a great first game, and Warner is going to throw 6 touchdowns. If I’m wrong, there’s always next week, when picking will be much much easier.

  • This is the stupidest thing

    This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. When do comedians have to apologize for their jokes? I think it’s perfectly reasonable to read in a comic strip that Georgie has the lowest IQ of any previous president. That’s funny. It’s scary that it might be true, and he’s not doing anything I can see to make that joke not funny. Why apologize?

    I’ve decided that when I retire, I’m going to run for Congress. It may not be a serious bid, but I’m going to do it. I may start small and run for city council or the school board, but I’m running. I hear more and more every day about how corrupted everything’s become by the two-party system, and it just bothers me. My latest point of ire? Redistricting. We don’t pay a lot of attention to it because it happens once a decade, but here’s how it works:

    1. The census is taken and numbers counted. In the 10 years since the last census people have moved around, and populations shift. This means it’s time to move voting districts and reallocate representatives.
    2. State legislatures have the responsibility for redistricting, and if you think the national legislature is bad, get a load of your state houses. They’re snake pits of people not bright enough to make it to the national level. They’re the ones who decide how to draw up the lines.
    3. Whichever party is in power in the house at the time of redistricting gets to draw up the lines. As long as they don’t get too crazy, they can draw them up however they want, giving them advantages over the other party whereever possible.
    4. There have been several public cases of abuse, mostly in the South and California. If you get caught goofing with the lines too much, it’s called gerrymandering, which is my new favorite word.

    Doesn’t that piss you off? Couldn’t the lines be drawn by computer simulation? I’m no genius, but I think I could write that in Tcl over a weekend. I’m tired of everything in government being a vast winged (left or right, take your pick) conspiracy. The work of government should be apolitical for the most part. Legislation I completely understand as being a point of much contention, but the daily work of government and even the courts has become rife with political machinations. It makes me want to become a conspiracy theorist, but I just don’t drink that much coffee…

  • There really isn’t anything to

    There really isn’t anything to say today. I’d hate to not provide my loyal reader(s) with something to pass the time with, so why don’t you go rent a movie, go check a book out from your local library (like The Code Book or To the Bright and Shining Sun)? Yeah, that sounds like fun. Wish I could join you, but I have to work.

  • Tcl is fun for many

    Tcl is fun for many reasons. Everyone should learn it and use it in their daily lives.